Nico's Journal

I haven't posted much lately. Time for a catch-up.

Last Wednesday I inadvertently went off to a friend's apartment on the waterfront without knowing there was a tsunami warning. I think it had fizzled out; I didn't see anything and I heard it was about 40cms. Anyway, this friend dresses her little boy in blue and green and grey, and her little girl in... pink. Pretty much all pink, or pink and red flowers on white, with frills and bows and whatnot. She's only two so she probably hasn't any taste of her own yet, but I am so glad my parents let me dress the way I liked when I was older, in shorts and t-shirts, stripes etc, and in colours I liked, none of which were pink. Actually I have grown to like a bright, strong pink, but only as an accent colour. It carries a lot of baggage.

An aside: a colour-blind guy once told me that he was puzzled for years about why the world's armies mostly dressed in pink. I wish. Also someone once said that red is a strong, aggressive colour and blue is calming, so maybe dressing kids in paler versions of those will even things out. Once again, I wish.

Further on gender stereo-typing though, I got talked into taking part in a children's charity thing which sends gifts to kids in the islands. You have to fill a shoebox with various gifts: something to cuddle, something to play with, to use at school, for personal hygiene, to wear etc. Then you label the box "girl" or "boy" and give an age range. I rebelled against that and bought things I thought any kid would like: felt-tip pens in a pencil case, stickers, a maraca, two ping-pong bats and three balls, a hacky-sack, a yo-yo, sunglasses, a cap, some dinosaurs, and a plushie I think is a dinosaur or possibly a frog. Plus some soap and a toothbrush. I shall label it "girl OR boy. 8-10". I daresay that will annoy them no end, but hey, it might fix an imbalance by one child anyway.

As a kid, I played with boys' toys and would not have liked to get a box of pink assumed girls' stuff. In fact I'd have probably lied about my sex. I used to on holiday when no one knew me, because it's not blondes who have more fun. It's boys.

Maybe I should label my box "boy" with a "tom" on the front. :-)

From sorsha_khan, a quick survey thingy, basically about gender stereotypes. Because I'm bored and don't want to go to bed because I know I won't be able to sleep.

( The survey (your side, my side!) and my results )

That wedding? Had twelve speeches. Yep, twelve of them. I wish they'd warned us beforehand so we could have made pit stops.

The ceremony was fine (in fact the bride kept giggling and laughing, she was so delighted) and my only objection was the use of an almost unreadable cursive font which meant hardly anyone could read the words of the two songs we were supposed to sing.

The couple are about 22 and I was horrified to learn during the interminable speeches that he asked her father for permission to date her (about four years ago) and to marry her. WTH? I thought that sexist rubbish went out with the 50s, but then many brides, like this one, still think they need a male owner to give them to their next one. Grrr. I really thought those two were a lot more modern and, well, equal than that. I look forward to the civil union between two middle-aged friends as an antidote.


OK, that aside, it's Obama's inauguration tomorrow--at about 5am here. :-P I've managed to get up at 6 for World Cups and the like, so I shall make an effort to see this live with the rest of the world. I have laid in English muffins, tomatoes, cheese, and eggs, and we have a very good espresso machine. We are prepared. :-D

Like everyone else I was delighted to hear that Steven Moffat has taken over from RTD as Head Writer/Exec Producer--until snowgrouse reminded me of some of his misogynist outpourings. Here are two excerpts.

"There's this issue you're not allowed to discuss: that women are needy. Men can go for longer, more happily, without women. That's the truth. We don't, as little boys, play at being married--we try to avoid it for as long as possible. Meanwhile women are out there hunting for husbands."

"Well, the world is vastly counted in favour of men at every level--except if you live in a civilised country and you're sort of educated and middle-class, because then you're almost certainly junior in your relationship and in a state of permanent, crippled apology. Your preferences are routinely mocked. There's a huge, unfortunate lack of respect for anything male."

And here's a snippet from today's NZ Herald.



The language might be a bit yoof but I applaud the church and hope a lot of people saw the piece which was on the back page of section 1. What I can't believe is the bloody tragedy that this sort of statement is even necessary. Isn't it obvious? After all, no-one believes that slavery is a good thing any more despite it being in the Bible. I really get depressed about people sometimes.