To write the impossible fic!

[vilakins]

I see this meme has returned again. I had a lot of fun last time, we're being lashed by the worst storm in a decade, the roof is leaking again, and I need the distraction.

List three stories you think I will never ever write, and I will attempt to write a snippet of one of them.

[Edit] This meme is now closed. I'll post the snippets in a separate post today: seven pieces of crackfic!

Comments

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

OK...

1) Vila gets eaten by a space monster.

2) Servalan goes into contented retirement and takes up macramé.

3) Vilakins!Sue on the Liberator.

*is feeling both silly and evil* :)

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

They all sound like fun, actually!

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

Well, no reason you can't write all three of 'em, if you like. ;)

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Nah. One's enough. :-) And I know which one too.

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

Yay for decisiveness! :)

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

Uh, mushy Avon/Vila, B7 RPS, or... Servalan gets everything she ever wanted and lives happily ever after

[altariel.livejournal.com]

That is an awesome icon :-)

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

*glee* It's by the marvy snowgrouse who make the most fun B7 icons.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Eep! You know how to make it hard.

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm evil. I was simply knackered for ideas, so I just threw the first three things that came to mind at you (which kind scares me, that that is what I came up with...)

[redstarrobot.livejournal.com]

Oh god, it's so wrong, but now I want to see B7 RPS.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Not from me, you won't!

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

There was a community for it at one point.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I did not know that. And I'm glad.

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

LOL sorry, sorry... I find the darndest stuff. I think I have an internet weirdness magnet...

[kerravonsen]

(went back and looked at the old one, and decided to recycle one of them)
1) Liberator: the rock band

2) Vila is a psychostrategist working in cahoots with Orac to run psychological tests on the crew

3) Not only are Vila and Avon brothers, and Dev Tarrant is Del Tarrant's uncle, but Soolin is Jenna's sister, Soolin had a twin who was made into a mutoid, Avon had a daughter by Servalan who was force-grown by the Clone-Masters, Blake and Del Tarrant are cousins, Gan and Jarvik are cousins, Dayna's mother and Jenna's mother were best friends in school, and Avon is a latent empath.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I am impressed. That last one hardly left any cliché unturned.

And you know, I've read the first two!

[kerravonsen]

And you know, I've read the first two!

What, there actually exists a "Liberator: the rock band" story? The mind boggles.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

It's a Bizarro one. Vila plays the drums and I think Avon is lead singer.

Suggetstions

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

1) Vampire Vila (Because it alliterates nicely)
2) An AU where Vila is the one in the access channel not Nova. (Sorry Vila)
3) An AU where Vila is a female.
4) Vila is half Auron, hence his special sensitivites.

I've a sneaking suspicion I might have read the rock band one too, ages ago though.

Re: Suggetstions

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

There are only meant to be three, but this gives me more choice so let it stand. :-)

Re: Suggetstions

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

oops got carried away!

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

Ha, I'm doing this myself (and not getting nearly enough B7 prompts)... it's a brilliant meme.

1. Vila goes horribly out of character. Murder, arrogance, or any sort of un-Vilalike dickery you can think of.

2. Giant Ultraworld Brain/Giant Ood Brain: their True Love.

3. Vila gets arrested by the Guv.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Ooh, nice idea, but can I write the Guv? :-)

I shall give you some prompts now!

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

That's why I suggested the Guv, since it might be a bit unlikely:D. *tempts you anyway*

(And now I have images of the Guv as a Bayban-like character and my brain hurts. It'd be beautiful, though.)

[arenee1999]

1.) Orac get curious about another 'fascinating' part of space and the Liberator gets pulled into an Alternate Universe. The only person that can send them back is The Doctor. :)

2.) After the events of 'Sand' Tarrant realizes that he's madly in love with Servalan and runs off to find her so they can live happily ever after.

3.) Avon survives Gauda Prime but Servalan captures him and keeps him as her sex slave.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

#3 has been written several times by others! :-P

[kerravonsen]

Yes, but it's not something that you would ever write. 8-P

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Good point! :-)

[vandonovan.livejournal.com]

Avon/Vila hardcore PWP porn fic.


Vila written as the small, whiny, incompetent, useless spare part.


An AU where you rewrite the series and how much better it would have been if Vila had been killed on the London.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Oh, mean! But I know I deserved that. ;-)

[crycraven.livejournal.com]

Hello - hope I'm not too late to play...

1) Through teleport Malfunction, Vila finds out he's pregnant with Avon's child.

2) PGP, only survivor Vila is horrendously mutilated and ends up killing himself.

3) During a recon on a jungle planet Avon gets bitten on the penis by a poisonous snake and Vila has to suck out the poison. During this, despite the near death and the agony, they find time for a spot of oral sex. And details, please...

(number 3?...bargepole...?)
x

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Wow, I can write most things but you're making it very hard here. [flails with bargepole]

[crycraven.livejournal.com]

*evil, gleeful grin*