Visitors and bigotry

[vilakins]

I was going to do posts about the B7 episode Shadow and what Chris Boucher did to Vila's character, but our visitors arrived just after I got home. I shall do that from work tomorrow.

We went out to a favourite seaside tapas restaurant for dinner and ice creams on the beach afterwards. The food was as good as ever, but of course the SIL from hell dominated the conversation (all about the Bulgarian trip and family history). For once I'm glad I'm going to work tomorrow. :-P Oh and some of Greg's relatives (most from the non-Bulgarian side) refuse to go to the wedding because the bride is Maori. I cannot believe this--do these people live in the 50s? Well, all right, I believe it of two of Greg's sisters whose bigoted remarks have disgusted us many times, but there several others. [is appalled and glad they live in Christchurch] At least the SIL from hell isn't racist, a huge point in her favour--and I didn't know she actually had one. :-) I like her a bit better now.

I just hope Liz doesn't know why those creeps aren't coming.

Comments

[miss-next.livejournal.com]

That's terrible. Just how shallow can people get?

Unfortunately, I know how you feel. My late great-uncle (who died at the age of 100 a few years ago) had many good qualities, but he was also a terrible bigot. My sister went out with a black chap for a while, and Uncle would have had a fit if she'd married him; he, too, would probably have refused to attend the wedding. :-(

I never told Uncle I've got a bit of a thing about Indian men...

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I found it particularly shocking because racism is so rarely openly expressed here, so much so that I didn't know it existed as a child. The first racist remark I heard was from a taxi driver in London and my mouth dropped open in shock. He made some nasty comment about a black man, then when he saw my reaction, said, "Well, would you go out with him?" I said, "If he asked, why not?" It shut him up.

[zoefruitcake.livejournal.com]

they are indeed creeps :0(

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I had no idea. And I thought I liked several of them.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

That's astonishing and very depressing. The only consolation is that the wedding will clearly be better off without them.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

It will! And it was moved to a larger venue because of the numbers who are coming, so sucks to them.

[jomacmouse.livejournal.com]

Definitely sucks to them. That's just wrong, and I'm glad you and the happy couple and all the other rellies and friends have a splendid time without the miserable so-and-sos.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I just got back and we definitely did. :-D No one missed the bigots.

[linda-joyce.livejournal.com]

Yes they do live in the 50s, 1750s. It is mostly the fear of the strange and the different, the fact they can say things you can't understand because they speak a different language and possibly a little tinge of guilt for the way the settlers treated them, though you would never get a racist to admit that. But it's mostly due to small minds and pig ignorance and I think the happy couple are far better off with out that pack of idiots there.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

They are. They went to Christchurch at one stage to check out living there and decided not to because of Michael's rellies.

[vandonovan.livejournal.com]

Wow, that's shallow. D: I'm sorry your evening was ruined so soon. Blaugh. Thus begins your next few days of hell. If you need to vent, I'm all ears. :)

My other NZ friend is in Christchurch. I hope that that just means it's far away from you and not that people from there are generally bigots. D:

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I don't think they are, but then they don't have as many immigrants as Auckland does. It's very much more WASP. We OTOH are 25% Asian.

And it's just till tomorrow, but as I said at least the SIL isn't a racist. Just obnoxious in general.

[mistraltoes.livejournal.com]

That's rather... baffling; and very sad. Though it's good to see a positive point to your SIL, I guess.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

It is, actually! She's as disgusted as I am--and I might add other family members are too.

[quarryquest.livejournal.com]

I would actually say having someone Maori in the family should be really facinating. People can really turn into ostriches about anything they are not familiar with.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

It's so weird. Part of my childhood was in a Maori town, my father spoke fluent Maori, and I played with lots of Maori friends. I wanted to be more like them and certainly wished I looked like them. Maybe it's due to Christchurch being such a white city. [shrug]

[quarryquest.livejournal.com]

I always remember the BBC getting a kids drama about a volcanic eruption which had wise Maoris in it. I loved that (even if I can't remember the name!).

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

'Under the Mountain' from the book by Maurice Gee! Yes!

[jomacmouse.livejournal.com]

Was that the one with sluggy would-be overlords living, as the title says, under a mountain? It certainly sounds familiar...

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Yep, that's the one!

[san-valentine.livejournal.com]

It's depressing that people still feel that way, and ignorant, given that most of us are mixed race in some way or another, even if it's as far back as say, Saxon and Viking.

Fortunately, I get on with both my sisters-in-law. I don't see much of Denise (brother Geoff's wife) but I see Sharon (Chris's wife) about once a year and we get on famously.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

It's stupid. They probably wouldn't have gone to my sister's wedding where the officiant was a close Maori friend. He'd have married me too if he was still alive.

[kalypso-v.livejournal.com]

The one good thing is that it reveals your sister-in-law is not as bad as she might be.

I'd be proud to have a Maori in my family, though the cousin who was brought up in New Zealand actually married an Indian.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

True, though she annoyed me all over again this morning, I should know better than to say anything much to her as any opinion I will have is wrong.

[florencisalesas.livejournal.com]

Ever I find a show of racism like that I feel astonished. Anyway, those relatives aren't hypocrites at last.
Altough, they lose the opportunity to see if they have any reason to share that wedding with a Maori family, which could be an interesting experience.

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

Christ. The stupid. It burns. I hope they all reincarnate Not White.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I'm glad I don't really know any of them.

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

"Ohana means family" has evidently not sunk in with them.
May their attitude though not cast a cloud on the joyous occasion.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Ohana? 'Whanau' means family here, and no, it hasn't. Apparently Michael's mother, a strange old-fashioned little thing I've only met one, will hardly speak to Liz.

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

Ohana is Hawaian - Sorry Lilo and Stitch.
Interesting though wonder how similar the pronunciation is.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Ah. I can see the common root. The languages are related: a Hawaiian greeting is 'aloha' and the Maori for 'love' is 'aroha'. 'Woman' is 'vahine' and 'wahine' respectively. My father spoke fluent Maori; sadly I don't though I did do a class.

And 'whanau' is said 'fahn-ow'. :-)

[ultrapsychobrat.livejournal.com]

May the wedding couple be blessed with love--the perfect answer to the bigots' negativity.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I'm sure they have been: they've been together for over five years. They're pretty solid. :-D

[kerravonsen]

{hugs}

I don't understand racism. My Thai-Chinese sister-in-law is a lovely lady.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I don't understand it either. I never encountered it till university when a friend (who stopped being one right then) wouldn't sit by me in a lecture because I was with my Chinese friends (just remembered that), and in London when a taxi driver shocked me with his remark about a black driver who passed us.

[nautile26.livejournal.com]

Such attitudes are very hard to comprehend in the 21st century. Maori culture seems to play such a large part in NZ life. I was surprised however on a two week visit to the South Island a couple of years ago that we hardly saw any Maori people. It was very WASPish.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I think this may be their problem: Christchurch is very much that way. Here about 50& of the population isn't white. Still, Greg who grew up their hasn't a bigoted bone in his body so I blame the people themselves. His best friend from there married a Maori girl here and his family weren't impressed either. :-(

Hmm. I may rethink ever living down there.

[imhilien.livejournal.com]

How racist of those relatives... one of my cousins is adopted and half-Maori, but I've never seen two heads on her. :-p

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I just got back from the wedding, and it was great. There were heaps of friends and family there and lots of people saying how much Mike and Liz mean to them. We did fine without the idiots.

[imhilien.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you had a great time... :D