Spammer names

[vilakins]

I usually just keep the better spammer names in a file which I raid for character names, but here are two from this week which are useless for that purpose, yet far too good not to post about.

Brandie Q Bourgeois
Come on, isn't that brilliant on several levels? Brandie itself, its spelling, the mysterious Q, and the devastatingly accurate surname. She's blonde, with big lips and a liking for pink, frills, and small dogs, right? What does the Q stand for? Is it left over from her parents' first thought of naming her Barbie Q?

Vilaboa
What? Is this Dayna's pet constrictor which she named for Vila's tendency to cling and not let go once he gets his hands on a woman? Or is it one of Servalan's feathery fashion accessories she's named for a certain cute rebel thief she fantasises about draping over her person? Any other ideas?

Comments

[zoefruitcake.livejournal.com]

one of Servalan's feathery fashion accessories

definitely that one ;0)

I've not had a creative name spam message for weeks, I keep getting ones that I'm not even going to repeat here

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I think I'll name my white feathery boa scarf the Vilaboa.

[executrix.livejournal.com]

I had "the slop it death, else the wah! descartes" and "crust the allegoric tinfoil progression on presume"--which you could sing to the tune of "Puff the Magic Dragon".

[san-valentine.livejournal.com]

So you can !

*sings* "Crust, the allegorical tinfoil..."

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Those almost seem to make sense. I bet you could pass them off as poetry.

[san-valentine.livejournal.com]

Those are hilarious. I too keep a list of some spam names as useful sci-fi names - I used 'Juhani' in a story a few weeks ago.

I like the idea of the Vilaboa being Dayna's pet snake. I bet you laughed when you first read that name on a spam.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Juhani is a great name, very Ursula Le Guin. I name most of my minions after spammers.

[kerr-avon.livejournal.com]

Well, as a jereboa is a 'jumping mouse', could it be that a 'Vilaboa' is a 'running mouse'?


Brandie Q Bourgeois is obviously a MarySue in the Star Trek universe, with vast powers and no common sense.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Or a very chatty one?

She was given a red shirt and washed it down to a prettier shade of pink. It didn't help.

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

A Vilaboa obviously is a thieving little mouse which no cage can keep!

I thought Q as "Barbie"! Well they did do a version of Barbie in a Trek uniform. So i now have a very mental image of John De Lancie in a blonde wig High heels and a Trek uniform!!!!!!!!!

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

There's a Star Trek Barbie! [is stunned and strangely amused] What series? Original so she wears a miniskirt?

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

Yes Original
http://www.barbiecollector.com/showcase/product.aspx?id=150303&t=modern

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Very authentic!

[san-valentine.livejournal.com]

For the first time in my life, I think I want a Barbie. She'd go so well with Wedge - and her red outfit would look great alongside his bright orange flightsuit :)

Geek moment: red does not specifically denote Engineering, as it says in the ad, but Engineering and ship's support services - like security, communications, transporter.

I made myself a red Trek minidress to the correct pattern a few years ago. (edit: about 20 years ago !) Even got the proper insignia for it to from the Sheffield Space Centre. I don't think it fits now, even after being let out, but it made an impact.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Very cool!

It said she and Ken were sold with with Kirk and Spock; If they were still in stock, I'd consider them too. :-D

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

I recently got an email from a Mr. Simm who was offering me the best sex of my life. IMAGINE MY BITTER DISAPPOINTMENT when it turned out to be another Viagra spam.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Bwahahahaha! That's classic!

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

They know how to target their audience. I just re-checked and it was "Jesus B. Simm". I can't remember if I was watching the Crime and Punishment thing (where Simm had a beard and long hair) that night, too...

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

The two halves of the name Brandie Q Bourgeois don't seem to go together. My theory is that she was originally just Brandie Q. She worked as an exotic dancer (at least, that was the euphemism that she liked to use), before giving up work when she met and married Mr Bourgeois, a boring but wealthy man who always wore a a grey suit.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

It won't last.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

Brandie's not worried. She had a watertight pre-nuptial agreement drawn up. If they divorce, she gets half his loot.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Brandie blows a bright pink gum bubble and pops it, than smiles. "I'm not as stupid as I look!"

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

Now all we have to do is expand that outline into a 500 page blockbuster novel. :)

[san-valentine.livejournal.com]

Brandie has a masters degree in quantum physics and astronomy, but figured a spot of exotic dancing and a husband was a quicker way to earn her money.

When she tells her husband she's out late at night looking at the stars, she really *is* looking at the stars.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

I like that. :)

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Then you might like to know that Auckland has a real-life Brandie (http://www.farmcoveobs.co.nz/About%20me.htm) who helped find a new planet (http://www.times.co.nz/cms/news/2005/05/printer_art10005390.php) a couple of years ago.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

She sounds like an interesting person. The only snag is that as far as I can see her name is Jennie rather than Brandie.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

She's much more a character than the picture shows: very brash and down to earth (if an astronomer can be).

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

:)

You've met her, by the sound of it.

When I was a teenager, I had vague ideas of becoming an astronomer.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

She works at the Stardome sometimes.

I wanted to be a physicist and got the BSc, but then RL beckoned and I went into programming and travelled.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

I finished up doing military operational research (what Americans call "operations research").

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Really! What did that involve (state secrets aside)? Hardware, software, strategic / tactical theory? I have no idea what that's about.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

It involved developing and running computer models - mostly simulation models but also linear programming models and others. Perhaps the most important part was the writing up of the results, though, especially the drawing of conclusions. Of course, it was up to the decision makers whether they took any notice. Depending on the size of the project, we worked in teams ranging in size from a single person up to ten or so - about four or five would be typical.

Wikipedia has quite a good article on operational research:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operational_research

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I am impressed. That sounds absolutely fascinating. I like the solution to armour the bits on surviving planes that weren't hit on the grounds that they returned because they hadn't been hit in a vital spot.

I like to think that had I been in England during the war, I'd have been at Bletchley Park with my maths and physics, German knowledge, and cryptic crossword solving skills.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

Have you seen the play (and I think there was later a film) "Breaking the Code" by Hugh Whitemore, about the life of Alan Turing? I saw it with Derek Jacobi plsying Turning. He and the play wwere both brilliant.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I haven't, but he would have been! He's a great actor.

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Here's Auckland's real-life Brandie, then! (http://www.farmcoveobs.co.nz/About%20me.htm) She was in the news a couple of years ago when she helped find a new planet (http://www.times.co.nz/cms/news/2005/05/printer_art10005390.php).