Ficlet: Enhancement

[vilakins]

A bit of silliness written for last week's b7friday challenge. We had to use at least one of these three cricket terms: caught, bowled, stumped. This uses all three and was inspired (if I can use that word) by a picture snowgrouse made (behind the cut) and a lying advertisement spacefall rightly complained about. 360 words set in season 1. Sorry, Avon.

Enhancement

"Hello, what's this, then?" said Vila, pulling a slim metal cylinder from Avon's toolbox.

"Avon'll be annoyed if he finds you doing that," Gan said mildly. "Just don't get caught."

The tool had a thin line around its middle. Vila shrugged and unscrewed it into two pieces. He stared at the little spiral brush in his right hand. "What d'you think this is for, Gan?"

Gan put his mug down and lumbered over for a look. "I dunno. Maybe you clean components with it."

Vila wiped it over a laser probe and recoiled at the black smear. "Dirty them, more like." He quickly wiped the gunk off and put the little brush back in its container with a soft squelch. "I'm stumped."

Jenna smiled from her station. "Perhaps it's not a tool, Vila."

"Eh?" Vila opened it and looked again. "Oh! I remember those ads on the vid. 'The more you use, the sexier you are.'" He grinned. "I should've known. Bet he bowled 'em over back on Earth every time he blinked." Vila did so himself. "Hmm. I've been told I have nice long lashes. Let's see." He leaned over the shiny inside of the toolbox lid and stuck his tongue out with concentration.

Gan swirled his cocoa round his mug to mix it. "Avon uses makeup?" He sounded disapproving. "On Zephron, only women of low virtue do that. Though, come to think of it, some of the bigger ones might have been--"

"On Earth, Gan, it is quite acceptable for either sex among the Alpha grades to enhance their appearance." Avon came up from behind Vila and snatched the mascara wand out of Vila's hand. "I was looking for that."

"Avon!" Vila jumped. "Thought it was a tool."

"It is, of sorts." Avon paused, momentarily lost for words. "Vila!"

Avon and Vila stared at each other, horrified. Avon's eyes looked strangely naked, and Vila's were fringed with long, thick, curling lashes.

"I shall have to boil the damned thing," Avon said furiously as he stalked off.

"Well?" Vila turned to the others. "Does it work?"

Gan almost snorted his cocoa and Jenna laughed, but Cally smiled thoughtfully.

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And here's the picture. :-D