That sounds like my family: a round sponge with a plastic handle and brillo or plastic pads. I find all I have to do for the dishwasher is rinse any loose food off the plates. I've never had a problem. A friend who is hopeless with housework (she makes me look really good) doesn't and her dishwasher got so full of food it couldn't clean and in annoyance at having to drink out of grubby cups, I cleaned the thing out. :-P Why anyone would do that, or leave rubbish in the kitchen bin till it stinks, is completely beyond me.